“Win/Win”

Let’s next examine the concept of “Love” in the context of how it exists and defines the human experience today, as well as what it might mean in creating a better life for everyone. Love is a word which refers to a variety of different emotional states, feelings or attitudes which range from those of simple personal pleasures or desires to those characterizing interpersonal affection and many forms of profound kindness, compassion, and benevolent concern for the good of others. In today’s modern western societies, this state of being is arguably the most sought after condition a person could exist in, yet there’s still much confusion within these cultures of precisely what it defines. Other societies with a more ancient orientation, Asian, Middle Eastern, and Hindu vary somewhat from the Western romanticized interpretation to a more stoic suppressed traditional expression. Nevertheless, it consumes countless moments of human conscious thought. The idea of being emotionally connected to other humans in a fashion, that fills our minds with such joy, as well as pain, is the fundamental aspect of the modern human existence. It’s the emotional cornerstone of a socially vital unit, the family. But exactly what is love, given the fact it has no physical properties? You can’t extract from the human body to study it separate from our biological self. It emanates from the brain, releasing chemicals, that effect the entire body, yet we haven’t identified a love molecule, or cellular structure. Imagine, if you will, the number of manuscripts, poems, passages, and even letters written over the course of humankind about this very topic. While it may vary in context from culture to culture, it is the emotional essence of the human condition. So how does all this relate to my work, you might ask? Very simply, it needs to be better cultivated across the human species in order to stimulate more generosity, and interconnection among all societies and cultures. For its the ideological barriers that separate people, not biological differences. Race and culture stand in the way of unity among our species. Love vanquishes those discriminating behaviors, but people need to better understand precisely how to share their hearts, and not fear the rejection, or heartache that accompanies putting yourself out there to be identified as vulnerable, to be embraced by the connection to another’s love. How do we transform what we experience so naturally, yet awkwardly into a more functional overall experience for everyone? Let’s start by how we obtain our understandings of love in the first place. My own personal experiences are as good a place as any to start. I knew from my very first understanding of my own sense of self, that I was loved. It was a feeling of comfort, that overwhelmed any other feeling I could identify. A state of contentment like nothing else. It was always promoted as a preferred behavior by everyone in my family, but it wasn’t cultivated as a specific component of who I would become as I grew and matured. It made me feel amazing to know I was loved, and I was encouraged to share that with others, but I was never prepared for how vital it becomes to us as adults, in that my ego would create a conflict within me at times of satisfying my wants verses placing others feelings on the same level as mine. Somehow, identifying with exactly how important being truly connected was replaced by the ego’s relentless need to fit in. Acceptance without judgement is one of life’s biggest lessons to learn. Many people go an entire lifetime without ever attaining this vital attribute of connectivity. My parents weren’t at fault, they simply didn’t know this within themselves, they were attached, not connected by real love….